Everything has a Gender

Apples are Female - the best ones are at the top of the tree. Most men don't want to reach for them as they're afraid of falling and getting hurt. (thanks to Bob Fluty and Sue Cote)

Wine is Male - it begins as a grape, and it's up to women to stomp the crap out of it until it turns into something acceptable to have dinner with. (thanks to Bob Fluty and Sue Cote)

Ziploc Bags are Male - they hold everything in, but you can see right through them.

Copiers are Female - once turned off it takes a while to warm them up again. It's an effective reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed, but can wreak havoc if the wrong buttons are pushed.

A Tire is Male - it goes bald and it is often over-inflated.

A Hot Air Balloon is Male - to get it to go anywhere, you have to light a fire under it (of course, there's the hot air part, too).

Sponges are Female - they're soft, squeezable and retain water.

A Web Page is Female - it is always getting hit on.

A Subway is Male - it uses the same old lines to pick people up.

An Hourglass is Female - over time the weight shifts to the bottom.

A Hammer is Male - it hasn't changed much over the last 5,000 years, but it is handy to have around.

A Remote Control is Female - it gives a man pleasure, he'd be lost without it, and while he doesn't always know the right buttons to push, he keeps trying!

A Water Faucet is Female - it can turn hot or cold in just a matter of moments.

A Safety Pin is Male - it is often useful in an emergency.

A Foreign Movie is Female - it is not always completely understood.

A Computer is Female - even your smallest mistakes are stored in memory.



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