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Worst Country-Western Songs #3

Yes, these are real!

Touch Me With More Than Your Hands

The Last Word In Lonesome Is "Me"

Do You Love As Good As You Look

I'll Marry You Tomorrow But Let's Honeymoon Tonight

Who's Makin' Time with the Time Keeper's Daughter, when the Time Keeper's Keepin' Time?

When We Get Back To the Farm (That's When We Really Go To Town)

Walk Out Backwards Slowly So I'll Think You're Walking In

All I Want From You is Away

My Shoes Keep Walkin' Back to You

You Stuck My Heart In a Old Tin Can and Shot It Off a Log

And There was Grandma, Swingin' on the Outhouse Door, Without a Shirt On

How Can I Miss You When You Won't Go Away?

I'd Rather Pass a Kidney Stone than Another Night With You

Why Do You Believe Me When I Tell You That I Love You When You Know I've Been A Liar All My Life?

He's Been Drunk Since His Wife's Gone Punk

You're the Reason Our Kids Are So Ugly

I Keep Forgettin' I Forgot About You

She Got The Gold Mine and I Got The Shaft

Come Out of the Wheatfield Nelly, You're Going Against the Grain

My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend And I Sure Do Miss Him

I Changed Her Oil, She Changed My Life

Drop Kick Me, Jesus, Through The Goalposts Of Life

Thank God And Greyhound She's Gone

Don't Chop Any Wood, Mother, I'm Comin' in With a Load

If You Don't Leave Me Alone I'll Go And Find Someone Else Who Will

She Got The Ring And I Got The Finger

I've Got The Hungries For Your Love And I'm Waiting In Your Welfare Line

Bubba Shot the Jukebox

I Fell In A Pile Of You And Got Love All Over Me.

There Ain't Enough Room in my Fruit of the Looms to Hold All My Lovin' for You

Four on the Floor and a Fifth Under the Seat

She Offered Her Honor, He Honored Her Offer, and All Through the Night it Was Honor and Offer

Get Your Biscuits In The Oven And Your Buns In Bed

My John Deere Was Breaking Your Field While Your Dear John Was Breaking My Heart

Thanks To the Cathouse, I'm In The Doghouse With You

How Can A Whiskey That's 6 Years Old Whup A Man That's 33?

They May Put Me In Prison But They Can't Stop My Face From Breaking Out