Why Did the Chicken... 4

OHM: There was more resistance on this side of the road.

WOLFGANG PAULI: There already was a chicken on this side of the road.

COPERNICUS: Despite the evidence of your senses I can show that it is mathematically simpler to describe it as the road passing under the chicken.

GUSTAV HERTZ: Lately, its been crossing with greater frequency.

FREUD: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

BILL GATES: I have just released the new Chicken Office 2011, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your check book.

OLIVER STONE: The question is not, "Why did the chicken cross the road?" Rather, it is, "Who was crossing the road at the same time, whom we overlooked in our haste to observe the chicken crossing?"

JERRY FALWELL: Can't you people see the plain truth? That's why they call it the 'other side.' Yes, my friends, that chicken was gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media white washes with seemingly harmless phrases like 'the other side.

CHARLES DARWIN: Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are now genetically disposed to cross roads.

EINSTEIN: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.

BUDDHA: Asking this question denies your own chicken nature. RALPH WALDO EMERSON: The chicken did not cross the road . It transcended it.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die. In the rain.

COLONEL SANDERS: I missed one?

MICHAEL SCHUMACHER; it was an instinctive maneuver, the chicken obviously didn't see the road until he had already started to cross.

PAT BUCHANAN: To steal a job from a decent, hard-working American.

HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure right from Day One that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me.

NICOLAS SARKOZY: Well, obviously there were some Frenchmen on the other side of the road what other conclusion could there be?

MARION BARRY: The chicken crossed the road because the hen set him up!

GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

DICK CHENEY: Under threat from al Qaeda, the chicken had to get to his secret, undisclosed location.

HUGO CHAVEZ: The chicken crossed the road to stomp out oppressive American capitalist imperialism!

TED KENNEDY: The chicken crossed that road because I wasn't driving the car.

BILL O'REILLY: Because he's a pinhead!

RONALD REAGAN: I went to Berlin and demanded that Mr. Gorbachev tear down that wall and the people did so the chicken could cross the road.

BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken.

AL GORE: I invented the chicken.

GLENN BECK: If we look at this chart, I'll show you how George Soros bought all the roads in town and closed them so the only path left was the road the chicken crossed.



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