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Ralph Wiggum's Words of Wisdom
From the Simpsons character I'm bembarassed for you. My knob tastes funny. (thanks to Lee Johnson) Hi, Principal Skinner! Hi, Super Nintendo Chalmers. And I want a bike and a monkey and a friend for the monkey. Eww, Daddy, this tastes like Gramma! I bent my wookie. Lisa's bad dancing makes my feet sad. That's where I saw the Leprechaun. He tells me to burn things. Look Big Daddy, it's Regular Daddy. Look, Daddy, a whale egg! Daddy, I'm scared. Too scared to wet my pants. My cat's name is Mittens. This snowflake tastes like fish sticks. My parents won't let me use scissors. Slow down, Bart! My legs don't know how to be as long as yours. When I grow up I wanna be a Principal or a Caterpillar. Principal Skinner, I got carsick in your office. Dear Miss Hoover, you have Lyme disease. We miss you. Kevin is biting me. Come back soon. Here's a drawing of a spirokeet. Love Ralph Bushes are nice 'cause they don't have prickers. Unless they do. This one did. Ouch! I dress myself. This is my sandbox, I'm not allowed to go in the deep end. The doctor told me that BOTH my eyes were lazy! And that's why it was the best summer ever. My cat's breath smells like cat food. He's gonna smell like hot dogs. Miss Hoover, I glued my head to my shoulders. When I grow up I'm going to Bovine University. I ate too much plastic candy. I ate all my caps...ow! I found a moon rock in my nose! I'm wearing a bathrobe, and I'm not even sick. Will you cook my dinner for me? My parents aren't around and I'm not allowed to turn on the stove. You have the bestest Dad. He read me a story about Chinese food. Miss Hoover, there's a dog in the vent. Me fail English? That's unpossible. My face is on fire. The doctor said I wouldn't have so many nosebleeds if I kept my finger out of there. Your hair is tall...and pretty! Wheeee... ow I bit my tongue. It tastes like ... burning. Oh boy, sleep! That's where I'm a Viking! Was president Lincoln okay? I'm Idaho! And when the doctor said I didn't have worms any more, that was the happiest day of my life. © 2008 compiled from many sources by Howard Daughters |
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