Homer Simpson Quotes 2

Homer Son, for the rest of your life you're going to go to all sorts of horrible events just to spend time with girls...dances, stores, your wedding...

I love going to aquatic parks. Sure, they have worse rides than amusement parks, less fish than aquariums, but the parking is ample!

I'm asking because I'm supposed to care about things.

Thank goodness it's TGIF!

Marge, I thought this was an inocuous lunch, but it's become terribly ocuous!

Bingo! I love that game, but I can't remember what to say when you win.

Ah, alcohol. The cause of, and the solution to, all of life's problems.

What's the point of going out? We're just going to wind up back here anyway.

Lisa, vampires are make believe, like elves, gremlins, and Eskimos.

Save me, Jeebus!

Facts are meaningless - you could use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true!

I'm not impressed easily. Wow! A blue car!

Well, crying isn't gonna bring him back, unless your tears smell like dog food.

I don't hate your mother, I just won't be sad when she dies.

You're selling milk, JJ, and I've got a sour stomach.

How is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain - remember when I took that home winemaking course, and I forgot how to drive?

Who are you? Why am I here? I want answers now or I want them eventually!

Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'Sir' without adding, 'You're making a scene'.

I'm a 'Spalding Gray' in a 'Rick Dees' world.

Donuts...is there anything they can't do?

Trying is the first step toward failure.

Because they're stupid, that's why. That's why everybody does everything!

That's it! You people have stood in my way long enough. I'm going to clown college!

You know those balls that they put on car antennas so you can find them in the parking lot? Those should be on every car!

Marge, I'm going to miss you so much. And it's not just the sex! It's also the food preparation.

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